The House in the Woods – Chapter 3




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Prussia finally conquered his ever-so-slight fear and made his way the second floor. He gazed through the empty, suspiciously looking corridor. “Hmm, this is way too normal than I thought it would be,” he muttered.

He checked out the door at the end of the dark hallway. “It’s locked.” He mumbled. “Why do you always have to lock your doors, Russia? Where the hell did you put your goddamn keys?” he cursed under his breath. He finally settled down and found a single note on the door.


“Another stupid clue, I suppose.” Prussia sighed, “Seriously Russia, just tell me where you put away your stupid keys! I’m sick and tired of this!”

You’ll never learn, a voice said. You never learn to be patient, do you, Prussia-kun?

Prussia looked around and saw no-one. “Ghost, get lost. I’m sick to death of this mansion, and I’m seriously thinking of leaving ya know.”

You’ll never get out of here if you’re not patient enough to think, you know that all too well.

“Yeah, yeah I know. Now get out of my way. You’re annoying, and you know it”

And with that, Prussia got further away from the locked door.

Prussia aimed at the first door he saw earlier. As he walked past the still armour, suddenly he saw something quite familiar, something black. “A decorative cat’s ornament… Just kidding, hehe.” The figure finally spoke. He immediately realised that it was the cat.

“Not you again…” Prussia sighed, ignoring the cat’s blatant joke and high-pitched voice.

“Ugh, don’t just ignore me!” the cat yelled.

“You know, sometime you talk like America or Sealand or someone like them. Frankly, I never truly understand what Russia sees in you, and why he ever keeps you anyway.” Prussia sighed.

“Ya know, it’s not important how he meant to me, but how I meant to him.” The cat said, with a voice that set chills to Prussia’s spine. Prussia just ignored him and advanced himself into the room.

Inside was dark and somewhat eerie, he almost didn’t  see a thing.

Just stay calm, Prussia-kun, the voice came to him once again

“I know,” he whispered. “I’ll be fine”

He slowly made his way to the end of the room. There were two notes taped on the wall. He read the first one.



Next to the note was a giant cobweb, which Prussia found creepy and somehow weird. “Better not touch it.” Prussia made a mental note to himself.

Across from the web were several barrels. “This is the storage, right? Bet there is some vodka inside. It’s Russia, after all.”

Prussia left the room, and made his way to the next room. It was a small library, where the pale man used to spend his spare time.

To the right was a small invisible figure trying to stack some books.

“Lithuania?” Prussia asked

“Yes, sir.” The figure said while turning towards him. “Mr. Prussia, I knew you came back”

“I am. But not for long. I need to find Russia. Something peculiar is going on here. Do you happen to know what it is?”

“I’ll tell you everything, sir, but I’m completely snowed under at the moment. I need to tie these books together, but I can’t seem to find something appropriate to do the trick.”

Prussia remembered the note he read in the dark room. “Hold on,” he finally said, “I’ll get you what you need. Just stay here.”

Prussia bade Lithuania farewell, then went on to have a look at the books on the shelves.

Several books, he already knew they were there. Studies by Marx, Engels, Lenin… literary works by Russian writers he was all too familiar with… they all were still there. After all, he used to borrow most of them just to kill time during his stay at the Soviet household years ago.

Some others are newly bought. A brand new edition of “History of Russia”, several spy novels written by British authors, the revised translation of Goethe’s “Faust”, and an encyclopedia. However, there were 2 books which are not known to any publishing house in the world.

He opened one of them and read, hoping that he could fathom all the grotesque events in the house while he was gone.

“Keys do not open doors in this mansion.

Something else must serve as a key.”

He then picked the next book and skimmed through it for useful facts.

“The form of the house changes based upon the spells chosen by the sorcerer.”

After that he looked for something else that would cater for his taste. While he was looking he came across a book titled “A Funny Story”.

“Hmm, I never knew Russia had a sense of humour. May as well check it out”

He opened the book and read.

Once upon a time, there was a man pulling along a cart filled with treasure.

His cart had broken down in the woods, but there came a passing hunter and his dog.

The rich man pleaded to the hunter to keep a close eye on his cart, to which the hunter agreed.

The rich man went to get a new cart. Meanwhile, the hunter kept watch.

Night soon fell, and the hunter grew worried for his elderly mother still at home.

So the hunter told the dog to watch the cart and went home to check on his mother.

When the man returned, he saw the dog on guard.

So he gave the dog a reward for his master, a silver coin, to carry in his mouth.

The dog ran all the way home and brought his master the silver coin. But the hunter flew into a rage.

“I told you to watch the cart, and what did you do? You stole from it!” So the master killed the dog.”

“What. The. Hell?” was all Prussia could say after reading the not-so-funny story

Suddenly the whole library shook with hysterical laughter. The chairs, tables and shelves all shook with amusement. This is absolutely not worthy of making fun of! his mind literally screamed. Maybe it WAS supposed to be funny… to them. Prussia knew, however cruel and sadistic Russia may seem, he would never, ever in his life, find this hilarious.

He left the library and examined the opposite room. Inside was a large exhibition hall, filled with a great deal of tiny spider webs. “Wow.” Prussia exclaimed. “I’ve never seen this room before… Okay, this is definitely  brand new. Russia cannot store an entire exhibition hall in his room, right?”

In front of him were two glass cases aligned in the room. Most of them were replicas of human heads, most of them look like deceased world leaders. “Creepy…” In the corner of one of the 2 cases laid a lovely blue butterfly model. “So good to finally find something pretty in all this bedlam” Prussia said to himself.

He then remembered about the giant cobweb. Wasn’t there something stuck on that? Ah yes, a yellow butterfly, a real one trapped inside and going to be eaten by an invisible giant spider. The note said the spider has poor eyes and cannot tell colours apart… could it be the solution to save the poor butterfly and free himself too? He tried opening the lid, but to no avail. The lid was just too heavy for him.

He walked deeper into the room, hoping to find other hints to the riddle. He found a bookcase full of webs and pieces of paper scattered everywhere. One of the pieces read:


He recalled the barrels back in the dark room.

And it clicked.

Prussia ran back to the dark room. He sifted through the barrels. “Wow, just as I though, full of vodka.” One of them was painted blue, and on top of the lid was a rope. Prussia took it with him and went straight back to the library.

He then gave the piece of equipment to Lithuania. “Here you go.”

“Thanks so much.” Lithuania said with a cheerful tone. “Why didn’t I think of this sooner?”

“You’re welcome.” Prussia smiled a little. “Hey, can you now tell me what’s going on here?”

“Yes, sir.”

And Lithuania told Prussia everything the former satellite knew. Prussia listened carefully, and finally nodded.

“So I HAVE to get out of the house, yes?”

“Basically most can’t, but if you know the trick, you’ll be able to get out of here without being killed.” Lithuania finally said. “Also, Master Russia told me to give to you this once you arrived here.”

Prussia took what the faithful servant gave him and observed it closely.

“The Book of Death.

“I don’t know why he sent you this, sir.”

“It’s okay. I’ll figure it out soon enough. Well, I think you should go back to your business.”

“Yes, sir. Goodbye sir, and good luck.”

He said goodbye to Lithuania once again, and returned to the exhibition room.



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